Challenging Normal

I want to come from a very personal place this week and be transparent with some of my own issues. Currently, I teach foster parent classes for the Department of Family and Children's Services. As part of our curriculum we teach on separation, grief and loss. As my co-trainer taught, my mind wandered to my own situation in life. Through the moving process and transition in my family, I realized that I have encountered a deep separation and as a result grief. It hit me like a ton of bricks! I am in the grieving process and it is a natural part of life. God began challenging me to stop denying myself the opportunity to grieve what I have lost and those I have been separated from.

The stages of grief are very different and are not concrete. You can move forwards and backwards through the stages and even become stuck in one stage. The stages are:

• Denial (this isn't happening to me!)
  
• Anger (why is this happening to me?)
  
• Bargaining (I promise I'll be a better person if...)
  
• Depression (I don't care anymore)
  
• Acceptance (I'm ready for whatever comes)

I am beginning to grasp that separation and grief are closely related and they do not go away. If you ignore how you feel, your emotions and thoughts will build up until you explode. I am coming to a place in my life where God is teaching me to deal with life day by day. I am learning that I am not alone in this journey of life and it is perfectly natural to feel conflict. Grief should only last for a season though and it is imperative that once the process is over and the lesson is learned, you must move on.

Are there things in your life that you are grieving? Are there issues in your life that you have not dealt with that might be causing you conflict?